To set the scene – Charlotte and I were discussing clothes and shapes today. She was concerned that she may not be able to get into a particular garment this weekend.
As timing would have it – someone posted on Facebook a video of a hamster getting stuck in a hole cut into a cardboard lid. The poor little thing gets stuck half way and after mega effort gives up and tries to go back again. And fails again. Eventually it manages to wriggle back down.
Hold that image.
I have been building up my marathon wardrobe. And the one thing remaining is the sports bra. I’m not particularly big in that department but every book and article I read says that size doesn’t matter and I should invest.
So looking thru the Adidas sale this week (football was on) I found 2 great looking items that may fit the bill. My issue has always been the length of my back and shoulder strap length (or lack of). So I was particularly attracted to the one where ‘ the model is 5″11′ and wears size x.’ I’m 6″. They arrived today.
Going out for a run this afternoon I decide to try them out. Put the first one on (no clasps) get it on and immediately know despite it being a great design and comfortable, the shoulder straps are not long enough. So I take it off – or more to the point I don’t. Takes me 10 minutes to wriggle out of this thing. I really should have stopped there.
The second one has side clips – after a bit of effort I manage to get it on. Same issue as before. Lovely and well made – but not long enough. So – to take it off. By this time it has vacuum sealed itself to my chest. I can’t even get the clips undone. Manage to get one undone so try to go with that. Nope. It brought back the memory of wearing one if those rubber things that go from boob to butt to a wedding. I looked fabulous until half way thru the evening when it went up like a roller blind.
I’m on my own in the house and laughing hysterically face down on the bed desperately trying to get a band of synthetic something over my head without strangling myself or dislocating my shoulder. Could i go round to the neighbour? I know shes in. No i cant. Do i wait for Steve? He’ll be ages and I’m well on the way to a panic attack. Besides – i want to keep some mystery in my marriage and undergarment accidents wont help.
All i can see is that hamsters expression trying to unstick itself.
Karma’s a bitch.
Sorry Charlotte x